At some point, every Canadian has to decide how far they are willing to compromise themselves. Do they support the interests and aims of this country and her people? Or are they going to watch the Super Bowl?

One assumes that not every American supports the current U.S. administration’s approach to international friendship – ‘treat ‘em mean to keep ‘em keen.’

The same way that not every Canadian who’s gone to an NHL or NBA game in the past week has booed The Star-Spangled Banner.

It just seems that way.

The situation has gone DEFCON1 so quickly that organizers of a coming Quebec City hockey tournament for preteens were forced to beg their audience not to jeer the American kids.

“They won’t talk about politics,” the tournament’s general manager promised. Has this man ever met an 11-year-old boy? All they care about is tariffs.

Disappointingly, America doesn’t seem alarmed by these developments. The anthem booing didn’t produce much anger down south. A few headlines. That’s it. The reaction was more like confusion – ‘Canada has thoughts of its own? Why didn’t they say something before?’

It’s even more disorienting as a Canadian. All of a sudden, the conversation has changed from ‘Canada Day? Ew.’ to ‘This Hour Has 22 Minutes is a hot, new show and you should check it out.’

The whiplash nature of the current U.S. news cycle – trade war today, luxury battlefield condos tomorrow – means Americans have already moved on. It’s hard to fight someone who won’t meet you outside in the parking lot. So whatever measures we take are, for the time being, designed to please ourselves.

It’s one thing to boo an anthem. That’s low stakes. Very last week.

If this is a real patriotic throw down, Canadians are going to have to sacrifice things. Things such as affordable oranges in January and our habit of passively absorbing American jingoism.

Have you ever thought about the fact that all the Captain America movies have been No. 1 hits in Canada, but the first Captain Canuck movie has yet to be made?

Why do I know that the capital of Idaho is Boise, having never been there, but I have to really think about the difference between St. John’s and Saint John, and I’ve visited both of them for work and pleasure?

We are estranged from our own culture and America is to blame. The only reason we don’t see it is because most of us share a language. Quebec was right all along. The rest of us should have listened to it.

This state-level para-socialism is never more apparent than on America’s national holidays – the Super Bowl, the Academy Awards and whenever Kanye West shows up to anything.

The Super Bowl’s the worst example – a shameless act of self-regard disguised as a competition. It was designed that way.

At Super Bowl 4 in 1970, they restaged the Battle of New Orleans from the War of 1812, including cannon fire and (pretend) mass casualties. Our side lost again.

Yet only two countries treat the Super Bowl as a saint’s day for heavy drinkers – the U.S. and Canada.

An average of 120 million Americans watched last year’s game – about 35 per cent of the population.

Ten million Canadians on average tuned in to watch – about 25 per cent of the population.

Forty-odd million people watched it in the rest of world – less than 1 per cent of that population.

This is the end of Clockwork Orange, except no one has to strap us into a chair to watch the brainwashing machine. We show up with a six-pack and homemade guacamole.

“We have become the winter version of the Fourth of July celebration,” commissioner Paul Tagliabue said 34 years ago.

He was being modest. The Fourth of July is the summer version of the Super Bowl, and doesn’t do anywhere close to the same numbers. During that interregnum – 2016-24 – when America’s history became fraught, July 4th was put on notice, but football remained untouchable.

Sunday’s Super Bowl will welcome Canada’s first 21st-century antagonist, U.S. president Donald Trump, into the mainstream of American pop culture. The most important tastemaker in football – Taylor Swift’s boyfriend and proxy, Travis Kelce – has already endorsed him. He called Trump’s attendance at the game “a great honour.”

According to reports, Trump will be bringing back the tradition of doing a sit-down interview with the host broadcaster, Fox, in the run-up to the game. Whatever your opinion of his first three weeks in charge, you’ll agree on this at least – he’s winning. America loves a winner. Even the people who claim they don’t.

If you were the sort who has been hoping, for the past nine or so years, that Americans would sort out their differences, it looks as though they have. You happy now?

Like a lot of American things, the Super Bowl is no longer good for Canadians. Not because it’s become politicized – it always has been. But because its current politics are aimed straight at our heads.

Every 51st-state joke is the diplomatic equivalent of doing war games on the border. It’s not a threat. It’s worse than that. Every time it is repeated – whether by the president or a late-night TV show host – it grows a little more from a baby punchline into a full-sized policy objective.

Greenland and Panama are in the same boat, but they don’t get their news from CNN and The New York Times. They weren’t raised on American music, American shows and American sports. They are cultural adults. We are someone else’s cultural ward.

This isn’t to say you shouldn’t watch the game. You should do whatever you like. Enjoy our freedom of choice while we still have it.

But you should not watch thinking that it’s harmless because it’s sports. Sports is how they get their hooks into you. Sports is how they warp your mind so that you miss the big stuff.

Kansas City by three.